Now that you’ve clicked on this article, I may or may not have exaggerated about the “Effective” portion of the title. For that I apologize, but the silver lining is that coping mechanisms are quite variable. In that different things are successful for different people.

Anyways, a coping mechanism can be defined as a mental health strategy or behavioral approach to manage stress, anxiety, depression, difficult emotions, and all types of mental illnesses and their symptoms. These mechanisms can be healthy, like exercise or talking it out with friends; they can also be unhealthy like isolating or substance use. In my case, I tend to favor the unhealthy ones for the main reason that they are unhealthy, and while they provide relief for my symptoms, they also essentially shorted my lifespan. Granted, this is not preferable, and I strongly dissuade you or your loved ones from favoring the unhealthy coping mechanisms. While they do help, they often form equally unhealthy habits, and will harm your physical and mental health in the long run.

Below are some Coping Mechanisms for Anxiety and Depression, though most work for other mental illnesses by providing mental wellness. That’s the idea at least.

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While Mindfulness can be defined as the practice of being fully present and aware of the current moment. It can also be any thought process that involved paying attention to your thoughts, feelings and bodily sensations as they arise, without judgement. This fosters an acceptance of oneself, reducing stress, improving emotional regulation, and enhancing overall well-being. This of course sounds rather simple but can be one of the more difficult practices to master. In my case, it involves actively fighting against the parts of myself that belittle my self-esteem, rerouting my thoughts away from the past and future, and trying to ground myself in the moment that I am currently experiencing. The trick is developing your self awareness, recognizing patterns of your mental illness, and attempting to pierce the veil that your depression, anxiety or other illnesses will place over you. It took a while to recognize what paths my depression or anxiety would lead me down, and even today I sometimes indulge these unhelpful thoughts before recognizing what I was doing. There are many other practices that fall under the umbrella of Mindfulness, such as Self-Compassion, Reframing, Grounding Techniques, Meditation, Written Reflection, and Complete Engagement. I certainly did not achieve any of the results I wanted when I started trying to practice Mindfulness, and I would not even say that I am competent with these skills yet, but with repetition and practice, these skills are another useful tool in the fight against mental illnesses.

Exercise, my oldest enemy. Regular exercise does have proven benefits for both physical and mental well-being, but it does require a certain level of determination and ability that not all can put forth. However, regardless of your skill level, fitness level, or even your capabilities, there are numerous ways to perform physical activities that may not even be considered exercise. Personally, I was trained Pavlovian style to dislike exercise, as it was used as a punishment during my sport’s practices when I was younger. Not to mention these days, my body has deteriorated far faster than my age would suggest due to my mental and physical illnesses. Though there are indeed ways to engage in physical activities without the use of running, weightlifting, or even going to a gym. Physical Activity can really be whatever you want it to be, so long as it gets you moving something. You don’t have to sweat or push yourself to your limits, rather trying to stay within your limits may be more helpful at first. Associating it with something that you enjoy can also be an easy way to get started, whether that be walking with your pet, taking a kayak out on a lake, or just walking to and from the parking lot every day at work. Small manageable steps to begin moving your body can be an invaluable way to begin an activity program that would be easier to keep even when you aren’t feeling your best. Of course, doing more when you are able is always a good thing, but never try to push yourself at the beginning, as this can turn you off from exercise all together.

Breathing, while necessary for survival, can be used as a tool for managing your stress and calming down when your emotions start running rampant. I personally find that guided breathing techniques through either videos or apps helped me get a handle on how to breath for different results. Though basically breathing deeply through your nose and breathing out slowly through your mouth can be an easy place to start practicing a certain level of control needed for some of the more “advanced” techniques. This can be incorporated with Mindfulness and even used while meditating if that makes you see better results or results faster. I use it mainly for emotional regulation and grounding myself in the moment when my anxiety or anger begins to swell out of control. This does require a bit of caution though, as controlled breathing without practice can easily lead to some dangerous situations. If at any point you get dizzy or lightheaded, it is HIGHLY recommended that you stop the breathing technique and begin breathing regularly. As improper controlled breathing can actually cause you to pass out and most of the situations that I use the breathing for, are not places or situations in which passing out would be safe or acceptable. Safety should always come first when trying something like this for the first, or even the hundredth time, though that of course is something you’ll also need to work on fostering if you’re anything like me and often disregard personal safety due to certain depressive desires.

Writing down your thoughts, experiences, or even goals for the hour, day, or week can provide a very valuable glimpse into your psyche. This comes with its own issues sometimes, as writing things down heightens my anxiety about my private thoughts being discovered by the wrong person at an inopportune time. Though there are many useful, modern ways to prevent this such as journaling on your phone. However, there is something cathartic about writing on paper with a pen or pencil that cannot be overlooked. Your journal can be as detailed or vague as you like, can be a regular activity that helps you plan for the coming day, or can be a compilation of random complaints whenever you get the urge to write them down. Things like Journaling can be personalized quite extensively to fit your needs, and finding what works best can be a long and arduous journey. Generally, the payoff for something like this can be an immense return on the time and effort invested so if it is something that interests you, I wholeheartedly recommend it. You can even, say, start a blog under a pseudonym to vent your frustrations to the world.

While friends and family can often be a source of stress, they can also be crucial in managing your stress levels when you are feeling alone in the world. It really is a constant back and forth of helpful and hurtful when it comes to social interactions, at least for me. Though I am quite close with my mother, and she can often offer an outside perspective that despite my infinite wisdom I did not think of. See, it is this other way of looking at things by someone who may have not had your same life experiences that can lead to a positive change in how you view your own life. Friends are a good alternative if your family is not something that can provide what you need, even sometimes a better option that choosing family. In my own words, friends are people that choose to be close to one another and are not forced to be close just because you are related. If you couldn’t tell, I am not all that close with my family other than my mother, but I also have very few friends. Finding someone who not only understands you but does not judge you can sometimes be challenging. That of course is where professionals can fill that void, though even that can be difficult in its own way. Regardless, even talking to strangers on a forum such as Reddit can sometimes soothe feelings of loneliness and can offer usually constructive feedback. Getting support wherever you can be a difficult to master, but wildly helpful skill that you can practice just about anywhere, with anyone. So long as your Social Anxiety isn’t as bad as mine is, just another hurdle to surpass with practice though.

That morning cup of coffee, or that nightcap of whisky can feel like necessities for getting through the day. But at the end of the day, they are substances that provide some short-term relief from symptoms with an often overlooked drawback on mental health. Caffeine in itself is a chemical that energizes the body, and the mind, and humans have used it for millennia to get them going. Only “recently”, in the 15th century, has coffee been available as a delectable yet refined beverage to be enjoyed by all. Though even more recently, we have found that caffeine in coffee or by other sources, can negatively impact not only physical health, but mental health as well. There first develops a sort of mental and physical dependency on that morning cup of joe, to be able to face the challenges that the day ahead may bring. I imagine you’ve heard someone say, “Don’t speak to me until I have my coffee!” or even “I can’t function before I get my coffee.” and the worst part is they mean these things literally. Because the body and mind become dependent on the caffeine to function at the level they are used to. It especially can have grave consequences with those of us suffering from Anxiety or Insomnia. The caffeine itself can trick the body into waking up, and until that runs its course, you’ll have energy. Then once that runs out, your energy falls off a proverbial cliff, and you probably either reach for another cup or plan to take a nap. Do these enough, and if your sleep schedule was not already disturbed, it will be. Good sleep is to most people, mentally ill or not, one of the most important factors in physical and mental well-being. As for alcohol, while rather fun and useful, at least for me, also hides shadows of dependence and worsening depression. Alcohol and I have had, and still have, a very tumultuous relationship over the years. To the point that I will openly call myself an alcoholic, though not in the way that you often think of alcoholics. I am a binge drinker, meaning all the alcohol I consume for any given time, is done all at once over a short time period. This often results in a rebound effect for depression, in which I slowly but surely become more and more depressed when I am not drinking, leading me to drink more often, feeding into itself. Not only that, alcohol dependence is also recognized as a true illness unlike caffeine dependence, meaning there are support and/or treatment groups available for you or your loved ones who may struggle with alcohol abuse. There was a point in my life where I could not go a day without drinking heavily, it made me relax, made me more social, made me forget my issues and be happy for just a little while. This was in my early to late twenties, and needless to say that age caught up with me in this practice, and even if I wanted to, I cannot drink like I had in my younger years.

This one may seem like a simple no-brainer, but as I have found, sometimes finding the right therapist, or any therapist at all can be challenging. Between a significant number of therapists not accepting commercial insurances, and some that are qualified on paper but do not have the compassion necessary for the role, therapy can often be a harrowing experience. I can tell you, I have had awful therapists, I have had great ones, unfortunately the only way to really tell is to try them out for yourself. Professional therapy can offer several things that talking with your friends or family cannot. A licensed therapist can guide you along your journey with mental illness. They can provide and nurture various skillsets you may otherwise find difficult. Plus, in my experience, there really is nothing better than complaining about how awful your day was to someone you are paying to listen to you. Yes, a weird way of looking at it, but it boils down to someone that will empirically take your side when it comes to issues that you need validated. Though do be careful of finding what I call a “yes-man” therapist, that will continuously take your side, even when you are clearly in the wrong or endangering yourself. Another archetype of therapist to look out for is the classic “movie” therapist, “And how does that make you feel?” is honestly not a line that I have heard very often, but there are therapists that act like the ones you see in modern media. A good therapist will challenge your beliefs when needed, push boundaries while remaining safe, and validate your feelings when ignored by the world around you. Having a good therapist can be like having a look into your own life, identifying the issues, and working towards addressing them.

Creativity is only limited by the bounds of the imagination. Whether you paint, play an instrument, photograph wildlife, or write for a blog, creative outlets help manage your emotions in ways that not much else can. Some just give you a boost of good energy, while others can be an outlet for more negative emotions that are fall into the category of “better out than in”. It does not matter what you do, but so long as it is something you can find even a sliver of joy in, then I believe that it is worth it. As with all of these methods however, it can be easier said than done. There are times, with mental illness, that rob the joy from such creative activities, of tack on feelings of inadequacy. Modern society does not make things any better with the grind mentality. That any hobby, anything people do in what little free time they have, should be monetized. Take it from me, making money off a hobby is great and all, but it should not be your main goal. Enjoy your hobbies and let them be a distraction or an outlet above all else. Having fun should be just that, fun. Trying to make money from your hobbies has a tendency to rob the joy from it and add unneeded stresses. So, go! Be creative!

Compassion and Empathy are things that can be difficult to find in today’s world. From friends, family or strangers, most people will just walk right by and not bat an eye. So, by either practicing mindfulness or just expressing compassion to the world, can brighten your life even by a little. The difficult part, at least for me, is expressing that same level of compassion towards myself. I try to be kind to everyone around me, as no one really knows what is going through someone else’s head, or even what they are going through in their life. Despite knowing exactly what I am going through, I still am cold and even sometimes cruel to myself. I tell myself that I need to be cold and calculating, else I fall into an abyss of self-indulgence that I may never get out of. Is this true? I don’t know, I tell myself it is, but that can also be just unjust cruelty. Knowing the struggles and the thoughts that may plague you should not be a reason to beat yourself down. It may even feel like this is the right way of doing things, “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it” is what goes through my mind when I think of changing. What I am doing now, works, albeit barely, it works. I am staying alive, so why should I change the way I treat myself? Just because something works, does not mean it cannot be done better. Should you always try to do things better? Also no, as constantly trying to improve can be quite stressful when you have a lot going on in life. So, improve what you can, when you can. Be kind to others, and to yourself. Nobody is perfect, including you and I, so trying things that you don’t normally do can be scary, but life is unpredictable no matter how hard you try, so failure is an inescapable part of life. I’m not saying just wildly go around doing whatever you want, and forgive yourself for it after, but when you are struggling, be kind to yourself because not many other people will.

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Coping with anxiety and depression can be incredibly challenging, especially so when you are still considered “functional”. You get up every day, go to work, complete tasks, but underneath you are suffering. I know this well, and I try to cope as best I can. Life can be hard and cruel, and navigating this is just a commonplace thing that we are all expected to do. Some people have it easier than others, but we certainly are not among that group because of our mental illnesses. The best we can to is continue to try, build new skills, and push forwards. Whether you’re going through this by yourself or surrounded by loved ones, coping skills are invaluable tools in the arsenal against mental illness. I know it feels like it will be this way forever, and for some of us it may be, but the longer we fight, the more equipped we become. I will not use the light at the end of the tunnel idiom as I think its total bull, but it will get easier. Someday, maybe not so far in the future, the fight that you are going through now will seem less difficult. This fight is one that we are in for the long run, so build your strength, sharpen your skills, and continue fighting.

We may not win, but we sure as hell will not lose.